You work darn hard. Your hard work has gotten you so far in your work and your attention to details helps you to constantly deliver high-quality work and your clients are always talking about how fast, and amazing you are.
You have 100's of plans, and ideas that you're ready to implement if only you could get 5 goddamn minutes to actually get it done. You're constantly putting out fires that often you end up causing yourself because you won't let go and let your team support you. You have lofty goals and ambitions that you could very easily achieve if you had a system that supported you in getting out of your own way and soothes that fear that you are the only one who can do all the things, and that if you take your attention off of something for a second, everything could fall apart. (Even if you know, logically, it won't.)
You create hundreds of plans, but you struggle to execute on them, especially if a small detail doesn't “fit.” So you try to brute force the solution because, let's face it, you're really smart. But you feel like your attention is pulled in so many different directions, you can never enjoy the full benefit of all those smarts. You end up jumping between 100's of things at the same time and then get pulled away when a team member asks one small question and you just think… screw it, It's faster to do it myself. You understand the benefit of resilient SOP's but you struggle to create them yourself and you're hesitant to trust an outside eye, because nobody knows the business like you do.
I won't tell you how to fix your system right here, because effective systems are individualised extensions of your self and your business. But I can give you some tips that tend to work for people of your Perfectionist type.
You've got to learn to let go of what's going on. The way you're going to be able to do that without driving your brain crazy, is by having an SOP and system set-up that's exactly what you want. You will never be able to work within, or relax within, somebody else's system, so stop fighting yourself on this.